Musings

Meh.

I'm feeling highly ineffectual.

I'm not all that I should be at work. My performance is uninspired and unfocused. I hate being substandard at my job.

I haven't had the time to clean my house in... forever. The dust grows thick in the corners of the rooms. The effort it would take to do a total house clean would take at least a day or two and I simply don't have that much time. Kaori will be back on Friday and I won't even be able to clean the living room then. It's become overwhelming. I wish cleaning pixies would sweep in and sweep up for me while I sleep some night.

There are a quarter million house repairs that need doing and I haven't even gone to the hardware store to buy the needed supplies. I've MacGyvered everything together as best I could with materials at hand, but that's no substitute for the long term fix.

I haven't had enough personal time to regenerate and make myself healthy and happy.

And, worst of all, in addition to not being able to work, clean or take care of myself, I've been a horrible friend. I haven't had the time to socialize or spend a proper amount of time with anyone. I feel like I've deserted everyone.

*mopes*

My apologies to the Universe. I'm trying really hard to fix this.